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you used to talk to me.........im really really sorry for everything, i am......  i dont know what to say or do.......without sounding stupid or desperate or dumd, I know I am alone, lost and a single mom trying the best she can and failing miserably and being told how it is all my fault and I have made my life this way by changing things.....
and it isnt even about waiting or wanting or wondering anymore, I know what I have done is right and it was about time, I just didnt know how hard it was going to be
I have never done things the easy or things have never come easy to me and i am ok with that, has made me strong but there are sometimes when i am just to tired to fight anymore and the past few weeks have brought me to that point and tonight took the cake.........I have taken 2 tylenol pm's (which I never take pills) and am hoping for sleep, I could really use it, an escape to someplace where there are no cares ever
 .....g'night my elusive one 
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